GRUDGEMATCH: Rambo vs. Predator
July 26, 2010
Rambo Vs. Predator: Who will win?
With all the Predator hype surrounding the new Predators movie, I got thinking about our favorite jungle hunter. It wasn’t too long before I was having fond memories of the Rambo franchise, and began fantasizing about a showdown between the two characters.
Rambo and Predator. Both are skilled hunters and combatants. Both use the terrain to disappear and wait for the perfect moment to strike. And most importantly, both are capable of dispatching entire units of heavily armed soldiers. But if it came down to a showdown between the two, who has the winning edge? Combat vet or alien from outer space?
-Green Beret and Vietnam War Veteran.
-Skilled in survival, hand to hand combat, and guerrilla warfare.
-Trained to live off the land, feel no pain, and never surrender
-Suffers post-traumatic stress disorder from being a POW in Vietnam.
-Able to make lethal booby traps from natural terrain.
-What you call hell, he calls home.
-Compact bow with explosive tips
– 75% chance Rambo will find some sort of mounted heavy machine gun and carry it with one arm
Giving a stirring one-liner and then firing a machine gun in all directions while yelling “AAAAAAAARRRGGGHHHH!”
-Alien who dedicates his life to the hunt.
-Possesses strength and fortitude far beyond human level.
-Proficient in hunting humans and other species, studying its prey for up to several days before killing.
-Has never lived survived a movie and was once defeated by Danny Glover. (Hey, lets be honest).
-Active Camouflage which makes him essentially invisible, but short circuits in water
-Thermal imaging eyesight
-A shoulder mounted energy weapon (Plasma Caster)
-Various laser nets, shuriken, and a boomerang like razor-disc
-Self destruct device (used as a last resort).
Favorite move: Removing his face mask, roaring, finishing his prey’s sentence with an electronic translator, and then ripping the skull and spinal column right from their body.